we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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