i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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