I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize