I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.