how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?