he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize