I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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