I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
