I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
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Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
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She needs sedatives and a leash
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize