That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
