trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
He did a backflip because drugs
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