Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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