you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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