I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
