i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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