Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
