My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
