i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
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