Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize