he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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