Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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