Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize