I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
