exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i used baking grease as lip gloss
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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