Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
