I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
