I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
