Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize