Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
