worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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