You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize