I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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