is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
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Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
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Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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