Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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