It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Randomize
