I can text with my tongue
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
