She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
