this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Randomize