I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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