Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
