BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
