dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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