So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
