What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
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