did you get engaged???
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
