your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
