I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize