Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize