He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
