I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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