Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Randomize
