I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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